“For most of my adult life I have battled a weight problem. Since doing NLP with Karen I feel that it isn't anymore about fighting the voices, and therefore I'm able to 'diet' without it being all-consuming. I'm losing weight slowly but surely.”

Overcoming Depression

Allison used to describe herself as 'slightly depressive'. Outwardly to many people she was cheerful, friendly and successful. Close friends knew she had the odd low moment, although they didn't know how often those moments came along. She'd have felt ridiculous had they'd known. At times she would feel so low and unable to help herself that she would sit in the living room and cry instead of driving to work in the morning.

Depression; at least some of us have experienced a depressed mood at some point in our life, or know someone who suffers from it. At times it can feel almost impossible to snap out of, and it affects the most successful of people. Fortunately with recent media campaigns it seems that the stigma around depression is slowly dissipating, and people are finding it easier to talk about it and ask for help. The downside to this is that the label 'depression' is being used profusely to describe all sorts of issues such as:

• chronic (long term) tiredness
• unresolved grief and trauma
• ongoing stress and/or dissatisfaction at work
• long term relationship problems.

And the list goes on. Often this leaves the person feeling as if their problem is overwhelming, very difficult to overcome and therefore something they're going to have for a long time. From the field of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) we have some new ways of thinking about what depression means and how we can change it.

NLP is a field of study based on the belief that all behaviour has a structure which can be learnt, taught or changed. It helps us understand how our brain works, how we use language consciously and unconsciously, and how we create habits with our thoughts. With this in mind, there are some ideas associated with 'depression' that are helpful to dispel:

1. 'Depression' is something someone has

2. It takes a long time to overcome depression

We know our mind controls everything we do: how we think, feel and act with our body. In fact, there are six things we can do inside our head: we can create and remember pictures, sounds, feelings, smells, tastes, and we do self talk. This means that everything you do, whether it's admiring a beautiful sunset or remembering a sad event, is done in one or more of these six ways.

This suggests that 'depression' isn't so much something a person has, but rather something they do. What if they could learn how to do something else instead?

In my experience, when someone is doing 'depression' there are usually two main things happening. The person has unresolved emotions such as anxiety, sadness, chronic stress or fear. The person will also be running certain thought patterns, such as making unpleasant pictures in their head of something bad that has happened or could happen, which in turn causes a negative feeling such as sadness or anxiety.

The good news is that with techniques from NLP, emotions can be healed and released and patterns of thinking and behaviour changed. It is possible to experience less of those negative emotions and feel positive ones such as lightness and joy more and more often.

NLP helps us understand that automatic patterns of feelings and behaviours are usually running at an unconscious level of the brain. Likewise, the negative patterns of 'depression' are running at an unconscious level, even though the person may also be consciously aware of them.

It follows then that we want to be able to make changes at that level. That's where NLP techniques come in; they allow us to gently change the 'instructions' in the mind to transform negative patterns. Utilising language, questioning, visualisation, gentle and deep trance, it is the structure of the techniques that change unconscious patterns, and always in line with what the client wants.

A common perception is that it takes a long time to overcome 'depression', especially for those who have suffered from it for many years. In my work with clients, many learn to change their emotions and thought patterns within one or two sessions, and for some it takes a few more than that. It is usually a huge relief for them after years of counselling and/or anti-depressants.

It's not that those who let go of 'depression' and learn how to do more positive feelings never feel down again; after all, it is entirely human to experience the full spectrum of emotions. However, they do have a renewed ability to cope, solve problems and feel happy.

Furthermore, how long the patterns have been running does not determine how long they will take to change. For example, if you were to write out a recipe for a cake in pencil, and after making it once decided to change an ingredient, you could erase a word and write another. You could probably make that change the day after you'd written out the recipe, or five years later. It would be just as easy to change. So it is neurologically; changes can be made to both old and new patterns within the brain.

And what of Allison? A year since she began NLP change work she is still the outwardly cheerful, successful person people know her to be. Inside she has changed. Her emotions are steady, her sadness has gone. She feels grounded and in tune with what she does and doesn't want in her life. She's busy, enjoys her work and knows she can feel joyous inside. She also knows now that she is not a 'depressive person'.

We each of us want to live a full life, to enjoy being who we are, our families and our achievements. 'Depression' is something people can learn and choose to let go of. In turn, they can experience lightness, hope and a sense of possibility. That is the least we should expect of this extraordinary life we have been given.